A response to Trump’s Christmas Post

Dear Mr. Trump,

First and foremost, let me wish you a Merry Christmas!

you wrote a Christmas message with your questionable prose I report here:

Donald J. Trump
Truth Social, 25 dicembre 2024

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL!

Including to the wonderful soldiers of China, who are lovingly, but illegally, operating the Panama Canal (where we lost 38,000 people building it over 110 years ago). They’re making sure that the United States, the greatest country in the world, puts in BILLIONS of dollars in “repair” money but gets absolutely NOTHING in return. NOTHING!

And to Governor Justin Trudeau of Canada, whose citizens are crushed under outrageously high taxes (sad!), let me remind you: if Canada became our 51st state, taxes would drop by 60%, businesses would double in size, and they’d be protected like no other country anywhere in the world! Think about it, Justin!

To the people of Greenland, which the United States NEEDS for National Security—don’t worry, we’ll be there for you. They WANT us there, and it’s going to happen, believe me. It’s a win-win for everyone. Just wait and see!

And finally, Merry Christmas to the Radical Left Lunatics who are trying to destroy our great country. They’re going after your favorite President (me!) while letting 37 of the most violent criminals—murderers, rapists, and thieves—walk free with ridiculous pardons from Sleepy Joe Biden.

To them, I say: GO TO HELL! We had the Greatest Election in history, and in 26 days, we’re going to MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN.

MERRY CHRISTMAS! 🎄

Your holiday message has, once again, shown us the true meaning of the season—at least in your world: unsolicited advice, misdirected grievances, and a flair for international provocation. As the self-proclaimed defender of America’s greatness, your understanding of global cultures and sovereignty seems to be as deep as a puddle after a drizzle. Let’s unwrap your statements one by one, with all the sarcasm and wit the season demands.

Panama: The Canal Is Not a U.S. Souvenir

Panama. A beautiful, sovereign nation that you seem to view as some misplaced U.S. souvenir. Your assertion that the Panama Canal should be under more U.S. control because of American investments over a century ago is, quite frankly, adorable. Newsflash: sovereignty doesn’t come with a “return policy,” even if you kept the receipt.

Panamanian President Laurentino Cortizo has graciously reminded the world:
“The Panama Canal is, and always will be, Panamanian. Its management is a source of national pride and a symbol of our independence.”

Translation: “Please stop living in the past.” Panama doesn’t need U.S. “help,” and they certainly don’t need a lecture from someone who seems to think the world still runs on imperial playbooks. Foreign Minister Erika Mouynes added a touch of diplomacy with her statement:
“The canal’s success is a testament to Panamanian expertise and sovereignty. Any suggestion otherwise is both outdated and disrespectful.”

Perhaps, Mr. Trump, it’s time to focus on fixing your own bridges and highways instead of pining for someone else’s canal.

Canada: Hard Pass on Becoming State #51

Canada, the land of politeness, universal healthcare, and poutine, must have been thrilled by your suggestion that they become the 51st U.S. state. Prime Minister Justin Trudeau, in his ever-diplomatic way, essentially told you to keep dreaming:
“Canada is proud of its independence and its values. We have no interest in becoming anything other than what we are—a strong, free, and sovereign nation.”

This must be confusing for someone who equates “military protection” with friendship and “lower taxes” with loyalty. But here’s a thought: maybe Canadians like their high taxes because they get, you know, healthcare in return. It’s not a concept you’re familiar with, but it works for them.

And let’s not forget Canada’s burgeoning trade with Europe. While you’re busy threatening tariffs, Canadian oil producers are sealing deals with the EU, happily bypassing any need for U.S. “approval.” Minister of Foreign Affairs Mélanie Joly summed it up perfectly:
“Our relationship with the U.S. is based on mutual respect and shared goals—not annexation fantasies.”

Ouch.

Greenland: Still Not for Sale, Still Part of Europe

Your Greenland obsession is the gift that keeps on giving. For the umpteenth time: Greenland is not for sale, not for lease, and definitely not available for a Trump-branded hotel. Prime Minister Múte B. Egede has been remarkably patient, reiterating:
“We are not a commodity. Greenland is part of the Kingdom of Denmark and will remain so.”

Danish Prime Minister Mette Frederiksen has echoed this sentiment with her trademark bluntness:
“Greenland is not on the market, and it never will be.”

This year, Denmark even stepped up its Arctic security measures, deploying sled dog teams and drones to protect Greenland’s sovereignty. Yes, Mr. Trump, sled dogs—because even they understand that Greenland is part of Europe and not America’s next real estate venture.

Mexico: Tariffs and “Protection” Unwanted

Your proposal to “protect” Mexico—coupled with a threat to slap a 25% tariff on their exports—was met with eye-rolls south of the border. President Claudia Sheinbaum responded with her usual clarity:
“Mexico is a sovereign nation. We do not need protection, and we will not tolerate threats to our economy.”

Foreign Minister Alicia Bárcena added:
“Trade between Mexico and the U.S. is a partnership, not a favor. Any tariffs will be met with appropriate countermeasures.”

Mexico doesn’t need your brand of “protection,” especially when it comes with strings attached. While you’re busy threatening their economy, Mexican oil producers are selling to Europe without so much as a glance in your direction. It seems the world doesn’t revolve around Washington after all.

Europe: Tariffs and Threats Won’t Break Us

And finally, we come to Europe, your favorite target for tariff tantrums. Your ultimatum—“Buy our oil, or I’ll apply tariffs on your goods”—has been met with widespread derision. French President Emmanuel Macron, in his classic understated style, remarked:
“Europe does not negotiate under threats. We are committed to diversifying our energy sources and maintaining our independence.”

European Commission President Ursula von der Leyen elaborated:
“The EU is strengthening partnerships with Canada, the Middle East, and Mercosur countries to ensure energy security. We will not rely on any single supplier, especially one that uses tariffs as leverage.”

Germany, meanwhile, continues to export its cars with confidence, knowing full well that quality products will always have a market—tariffs or not. And let’s not forget the rest of Europe, happily sipping wine, enjoying cheese, and thriving despite your best efforts to disrupt the global market.

The Bigger Picture: Cultures You Don’t Understand

Your holiday message, Mr. Trump, reveals not just a lack of respect for sovereignty but also a profound misunderstanding of global cultures. Panama’s canal isn’t yours to claim, Canada doesn’t want to be annexed, Greenland isn’t for sale, Mexico doesn’t need your “protection,” and Europe doesn’t negotiate under threats.

Perhaps it’s time to embrace a little humility. The world is full of diverse cultures, each with its own values, history, and priorities. Attempting to strong-arm them into submission only highlights your inability to grasp the beauty of global diversity.

In Conclusion

So, Merry Christmas from the nations you’ve unwittingly united in defense of sovereignty and respect. Panama will keep its canal. Canada will remain proudly independent. Greenland will stay European. Mexico will thrive without your tariffs. And Europe will continue to sip its wine and eat its cheese, unbothered by your ultimatums.

Here’s to 2025, Mr. Trump—may it bring you a deeper understanding of diplomacy and a long-overdue appreciation for boundaries.

Warm regards,
A Sarcastic European Citizen

P.S. Tariffs aren’t Christmas gifts, and cultures aren’t yours to commandeer. 🎄

NOTE:

As a European born and raised in Italy, with Greek ancestry that has shaped my perspective, I’ve had the privilege of living and working in over 80 countries. My journey spans continents, from the vibrant streets of San Francisco to the serene temples of Kyoto, the bustling markets of Mexico City, the historic landscapes of Europe, and the dynamic innovation hubs and ancient traditions of China.

I’m married to a woman of remarkable heritage—half Japanese, half Cuban—who moved to Mexico at six and whom I met online while she lived in the United States when the internet was not what it is now. Together, we embody a blend of cultures and experiences that underscores the beauty of diversity.

I speak four languages, including Latin (because why not learn a “dead” language for fun?), and have deeply engaged with the histories and traditions of countless communities.

When I talk about global culture, heritage, and sovereignty, I do so not from theory but from a lifetime of firsthand experiences across the world.

And if I may leave a thought to ponder, inspired by my travels and learnings: “Sapere aude”—dare to know. It’s a fitting motto for embracing the diversity and wisdom the world has to offer.